Posted by
Marked in Pgh on Tuesday, August 19, 2008 3:16:19 PM
Jesse Owens upstaged Hitler and Nazism at the 1936 Olyimpics in Munich, and now Michael Phelps has done the same thing to Red China and its Communist rulers in Bejeing in 2008, on junk food. Mr. Phelps' seemingly impossible mission was being a big, aggressive American consuming huge amounts of carbs and a daily, PC free diet of 12,000 calories. How selfish of him, how politicaly incorrect! 0 How can one man, and an American at that, consume enough food in one day for six people? Why, because he works hard and strives for excellence, and has now achieved his goals, of eight gold medals. By doing so, he has eclipsed the last borish male to do so, another American named Mark Spitz, who won seven golds in Munich in 1972. Isn't it great to be an American?
Mr. Phelps, if I recall corretly, starts his day with a breakfast of champions, consitsing of three egg sandwiches, a five egg omelet, as well as three slices of French toast and three chocolate chip pancakes smothered in maple syrup. What, no bean sprouts? For lunch, he consumes a whole pound of speghetti and three double cheeseburgers and a 1,000 calorie energy drink. For dinner, the glutton indulges himself with another pound of speghetti, a whole pizza and another 1,000 calorie energy drink.
He needs all those calories for his workout, which consists of swimming six hours a day. Subtracting 2,000 calories for basic daily caloric needs, that means he is burning up approximatley 1,667 calories per hour during his routine (10,000/6 hours). Isn't he thinking about all those bad carbs and their effects on him when vegetarian joggers everywhere are puttering along on new, low carb foods? Doesn't he know there are children starving in Chi..., oh, never mind. He probably doesn't even have medical or health care insurance, the pig. There is a competitive body builder in the Pittsburgh area who was highlighted in a local news report. His daily diet consisted of two pounds of speghetti, three pounds of brocolli and five gallons of water.
I'd like to try Phelps' diet, for at least a week. But by then, I'd probably be stuck in my chair and need a forklift so someone could haul me around. A friend of mine determined to get back into shape and make himself more attractive to the ladies (fat chance). To do that, he gave up carbs (except Belgian beers), bread, refined sugar, soft drinks and went to the gym six days a week to exercise and use the cross trainers for up to an hour each day. He promptly lost thirty pounds and bragged to my brother, our friends and myself he had a work out that would make us cry. Actually, it caused his knees to swell up, so he had to modify his routine. I lost almost the same amount by going to the gym two or three times a week and only decreased the amount of food I ate. My friend eventually found a woman, who is obviously working on sainthood and willing to put up with him.
In all these examples there is one commonality. An individual American decided to modify his or her behavior in order to achieve a goal, uneffected by the negative preachings of the Left against the selfishness of the individual. In America, we are all individuals best left to our devices for our own benefit or detriment. To the Left, that is an impossible mission. Yet at the Olympics, we swept the the men's 400 meter hurdles, the first time since 1960, and an an American woman won the discuss throw for the first time since 1930, In addition, our two women beach volley ball team is undefeated and ready to play for gold. We even have our best woman's gymnist, Natia Liukin, ready to win the gold in the volt, even after being edged out of the gold for the uneven bars by a new tie breaker rule. She has already won four medals and her father is a former Soviet gymnist who has since moved with his wife to America. To us, anything is possible, it's part of being an American and not listening to political correctness.